The January Adventure
by Ad Absurdum
Summary: A bit of an exercise in writing. Ten drabble-ish chapters and something akin to an actual investigation.
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N:**__ The title of each chapter and the words beginning each chapter (except for the first one, and with a little bit of gymnastics with a couple of others :-)) are the titles of the songs from the album The Queen Is Dead by The Smiths.**  
Disclaimer:**__ Holmes and Watson were created by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle. No profit made._

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**The January Adventure  
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**1. The Queen Is Dead**

Doctor John Watson stood by the window, gazing down at the street. The January sun shone, sickly pale, at cobblestones, lumps of dirty snow and people who wore mourning bands on their coat sleeves. It was 1901 and Victoria Regina had just died. She was gone, just as the nineteenth century was gone. What would the new one be like?

'I'm asking myself the very same question, Watson.'

The Doctor glanced at the tall thin figure standing by his side and smiled. He was not surprised – not anymore – that Holmes seemed to read his mind. The years of living with the only unofficial consulting detective taught the Doctor that his friend could deduce things that escaped the ordinary mortals. Including their thoughts.


	2. Chapter 2

**2. Frankly, Mr Shankly**

'Frankly, Mr Shankly, I do not know what else I could do for you,' said Doctor Watson after he examined his patient. 'I cannot see any serious anomalies. Apart from a few problems caused by your advanced age, you are perfectly healthy.'

'Thank you, Doctor.' Mr Ichabod Shankly – eighty six years old, sparse gray hair, silver-rimmed spectacles and worn, though very well made, frock coat – taking his cane, got up and went to the door.

'You are still a young man, Doctor, but when one lives as long as I do, one starts to think about writing a testament.'

The old man said his goodbyes and left.


	3. Chapter 3

**3. I Know It's Over**

'I know it is over! Oh Violet, I will never clear those debts of mine. I will be lucky indeed if they don't land me in gaol.' John Scott Grayson paced around the room, from time to time glancing with desperation at a young woman sitting on a sofa.

'John, please, calm down.'

'I cannot, my dear. I cannot.'

Suddenly he kneeled down in front of her and grasped her hands. 'Violet, that uncle of yours, that rich old man... He likes you and he has no children of his own. Perhaps he would be amenable to...?' a faint and a little shameful hope appeared in the man's eyes.

'John,' the woman put her hand to her lips, 'I truly... do not know.'


	4. Chapter 4

**4. Never Had No One Ever**

I have never had anyone, the old man thought to himself. It seems that longevity also has its disadvantages: other people die and you just live on. Hmm, let us see, my closest relatives would be... Willy with his wife and Violet. Yes, she is a good child.

_I, Ichabod Edward Shankly, in my last will, give my brother, William Matthew Shankly, a sum of four thousand pounds. To his daughter, Violet Shankly, I give a sum of two thousand pounds as well as all securities. The rest, that is five hundred pounds, I wish to divide evenly between my servants: the cook, Mrs Wodehouse and my valet, Reginald Phelps._

_Signed,  
Ichabod E. Shankly_


	5. Chapter 5

**5. Cemetry Gates**

The cemetery gates were wide open to allow mourners and a carriage, drawn by two horses, to pass.

xx xx xx

'Hum...' Doctor Watson scrutinised an obituary in _The Times'_ morning edition.

'What is it, Watson?' Holmes looked up from his breakfast.

'Huh? No, it's probably nothing. It's just... a little odd. This elder gentleman who has just died, came to see me a couple of days ago. If you don't count arthritis, he was quite healthy.'

Watson pondered this for a moment. Holmes took advantage of his reverie and snatched the paper from his hands.

The Doctor looked at him with disapproval and then sighed, 'Well, there's probably nothing unusual in this. Death at that age is perfectly normal.'

Holmes did not answer.


	6. Chapter 6

**6. Bigmouth Strikes Again**

'The bigmouth strikes again,' Harker sighed to himself. He sat at one of the club's windows, amusing himself with observations of the regular visitors. At the neighbouring sofa, Sir Bertram started his usual monologue about his enormous luck at cards and the phenomenal sums he won.

At that same moment Harker saw John Grayson walking towards him.

'Mr Harker, I came to repay my debt. Here are the three hundred pounds I owed you.'

'But, dear boy, there was no hurry...'

'No. You are the last gentleman to whom I owed any money. I do not want to be in debt for longer than it's absolutely necessary. Goodbye.' He bowed and left.

Harker looked at the money and began pondering from where Grayson took this much in such a short time.


	7. Chapter 7

**7. The Boy With the Thorn in His Side**

'This boy...' mused Mrs Shankly, '...behaves as if he had a thorn in his side.'

'Really, mother.' Violet frowned.

'I know what I'm talking about, my dear. I really do not understand why you are so adamant that you will marry _him._ One should think that John Grayson is the only man in the entire world.'

'For me he is.'

Mrs Shankly looked heavenwards and shook her head. Violet sighed.

'We have had this conversation many times before, mother. I shall not change my mind. John is wonderful and I do love him.'

Mrs Shankly smiled indulgently. 'Oh, my dear child. Well, if he makes you this happy, I suppose your father and I shall give you our blessing after all.'


	8. Chapter 8

**8. Vicar in a Tutu**

'Vicar in a tutu!?'

'Well, vicar's wife in a dress actually, my dear Watson. But do not be so shocked. I simply came to the conclusion that this stage of my investigation needed, hmm, a woman's touch. You see, I had to look at our shady couple more closely and the best opportunity would indubitably be a face-to-face conversation. I had learnt that they were supposed to come to a nearby vicarage to talk about their upcoming wedding, so I sent the vicar and his wife to another town – it doesn't matter how I convinced them to do this, Watson – then disguised myself as the good vicar's wife and received Miss Violet Shankly and Mr John Grayson.'

'And what did you find?'

'All in good time, Watson. All in good time.'


	9. Chapter 9

**9. There Is a Light That Never Goes Out**

Such a love seems to be like a light that never goes out; looking at the bride and groom, Watson allowed his thoughts to take romantic turn. It is quite unbelievable that they could have had something to do with the death of old Shankly, he sighed.

Suddenly he felt that Holmes pulled at his sleeve. They emerged from the church and the detective, mightily pleased, announced-

'We have been allowed an exhumation. In a few minutes Lestrade's people will arrive and take the body of Mr Shankly to Scotland Yard's laboratory. And we shall go with them.'

After about three hours, Doctor Watson who, with the assistance of a police surgeon, preformed the autopsy, declared that the cause of death was a perfectly natural heart attack.


	10. Chapter 10

**10. Some Girls Are Bigger Than Others**

'Some girls are bigger than others,' remarked Sherlock Holmes, when the door of the living room at Baker Street 221B closed behind the visitor.

'Really, Holmes,' Doctor Watson shot his friend a dirty look. 'Mrs Ficklebottom may be a little overweight, but thanks to her you have a new case. Because this last one – I mean Mr Shankly's death – was, well, not exactly a crime.'

'I admit that you are absolutely right, Watson.'

'One thing I found curious, though: how did Miss Violet come into such a fortune it allowed Grayson to repay his debts?'

'Savings, my dear boy. You would be surprised how devoted young females who are in love can be and to what acts such devotion can lead. Of course, the chances that such dedication will last through the whole course of the marriage are rather slim. It _is_ rather fortunate that old Shankly left Miss Violet his money.'

Watson only sighed quietly at Holmes's cynicism.


End file.
